THE MYTH: 'Let a man be a man'

WARNING: RANT AHEAD

I seriously cringe every time I hear the asinine (to me) comment: "You have to let a man be a man..." said in public. That is by far one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. No one can "let" you be anything that God made you to be...sorry... But it is impossible for someone to control a dude's manhood.

They can choose the type of man they want to be affiliated with. And those CHOICES are made by how well you treat someone and how well that person treats you...or how poorly. The TYPE of man a guy decides to be is his decision. But being A MAN happens by virtue of growing up...That's just my take.

Admittedly, I am a cold piece of work...but not in the way many may think. I just hate whining. I was speaking to someone I hold near and dear and asked why I am so hard on women. This occurred because I wouldn't partake in man bashing.

I don't take part in woman bashing either. People make decisions and then want to blame other people for the outcomes. If you choose a person who doesn't treat you how you want to be treated it is your fault for putting up with it. That goes for men and women.

Back to the "let a man be a man" B.S.  I don't know why dudes think a woman can control their manhood. There's not a woman alive who can LET you be a man. You're either going to live up to your own manhood standards or you're not. If you're dealing with a woman who treats you like a P.A.B., that's your fault! If you're dealing with a chick who acts like a monster and not a lady...YOUR FAULT... If you choose to punk out instead of walk out...again...YOUR fault. 

You choose who you're with and you choose who you're going to be to that person. Yes, you can influence how someone treats you. But no one can control who you are as a person unless you lay down and let the person take over. YOUR choice...

For all these "grown boy" mantra shouting birds... That's what I have to call you... Running around spouting the philosophy of K. Michelle's unbalanced self....  Ladies, if you want a guy to treat you like a delicate flower, stop acting like a thorny rose or worse yet a Venus Flytrap. If you want a guy who is about something in life...stop tearing down the ones you find. Stop sucking the life out of him and expecting him to "handle" your dysfunction without you handling it yourself. You don't get to dump all your hang ups on dudes like you're Cinderella in some dumb fairytale...Why would or should he treat you like a woman you are not willing to be or work at becoming? That's just stupid. You want lady treatment while behaving like a tramp? Makes no sense. 

Same goes for you wimps who complain about women being ball busters or birds...Heck...you must like it..because that's who you choose to be with... If you're sorry enough to lay your manhood at the feet of a dumb acting broad...don't cry when she does dumb things. Furthermore, if you really believe a woman determines your manhood you need to get your mind right. Stop acting so simple. Your ethics, values and temperament are YOUR choice or fault...depending on how you look at it. If you can't be a man...YOUR FAULT... If you don't know how to be a man and you're of adult age...find a mentor who is about something and stop being a whiny bum. Get your life together and get help if you need it.

I don't care how many obstacles you face in life...you can Choose to be defeated by them or choose to get around them. And another thing... Stop using that "let a man Be a man" crap as a way to mistreat the person you're with. If you want a lady who supports you as your back bone...give her something worthwhile to support beyond foolishness, laziness, and complacency. If you want to be a man who is respected be a freaking RESPECTABLE man!!

If your idea of manhood is solely tied to your physical strength or reproductive organs, you're more like a bodily function than anything remotely close to a thinking feeling respectable human being. Somebody told you wrong if that's how you've determined manhood all your life. If your type of manhood is getting you what you TRULY want out of life...cool..but if you live in a perpetual cycle of let downs and set backs and disrespect and drama... Do something about it besides whining about what someone else is doing. Good grief!!!

And if you say as a woman, I can't tell you what manhood is...you're right..I can't tell you what manhood is to YOU... But I know for sure what KIND of "manhood" I avoid like the plague vs the kind I value, RESPECT and appreciate...

Let me add one more thing: Your mate is a reflection of you. If you have an ain't about nothing mate...Something inside of you ain't about nothin' too. If you can find a way to be a help to your mate...start by being a help to yourself. Stop blaming the person YOU CHOSE for BEING the person you chose. If that person has become someone else other than who he or she was when you made the choice...examine what changed and how it changed and offer help instead of resentment. If he/she chooses to not accept the help...do what you gotta do...

If you're the person who needs help OPEN your eyes and get your life together... Your mate is supposed to help you... But not be a crutch... You have to stand up and walk in your own purpose at some point.