Do you REALLY know the person you're dating?



This is who she really is

 


This is who you meet...

 
 

 Ok so I'm a little disturbed by some of the answers I received when I asked :

How long should you take to get to know someone before you make a physical, financial, and/or emotional commitment to him/her?

But the answers revealed to me that the crux of a lot of relationship issues come from people not knowing who they are with. 

I mean come on people! I know, I know... It was love at first sight.  We just had a connection...blah blah blah...

Well heck you could have just connected with the next Lorena Bobbitt or Ted Bundy.  Apparently that will be just fine for a lot of folks...as long as her loving is good and he's paying for all the dates. *side-eye*

I have given good counsel to a couple of married fellas who bemoaned how much their wives changed after marriage.  Ummm.. did she really? HIGHLY DOUBTFUL! Had you actually taken the time to get to know the woman, you'd have known she was a dirty bird, shop-a-holic, drama queen.  But nope...you didn't.  You saw what you liked.  Hopped into a relationship.  And then married her because she put on a show to get the ring.  Le sigh...

Oh, ladies...don't think you are left out of this discussion.  If I meet one more of you who says "He wasn't like that when we first met..." I will scream!  How do you know if he was like that or not?  You met him, dropped the draws, and then wanted to marry him, shortly thereafter.  I bet you barely know his middle name, let alone how many other women he's dealing with.

Look here...good, sound relationships take more than "just a feeling".  A relationship involves two people putting forth strong effort to keep it moving forward in a positive direction.  Now if you don't know whether or not the person on the other end is bat ish crazy...you've got a problem on your hands...just waiting to bust out in an adult diaper, hearing voices, and sucking on a can of cheese whiz.

Please take your time to get to know the person you want to share your time and life with beyond just knowing how good he or she feels to you.  It is okay to check out their backgrounds.  Not on some ol' sneaky, sleuth type stuff.  But by virtue of digging deeper than shallow topics.  Getting to know his/her friends and family.  Getting proof of health status.  You know...the things you would want to learn about an employee or a business partner... I mean a lot of you do more research on the car you'll buy than on the person who will ride in it with you. 

I mean if you don't care enough about yourself to know who you're sharing your body, mind, and money with...by all means...do you.  But at least think about any children you may procreate.  The world has enough nutjobs in it...please spare us the overpopulation... We need balance.

Ok...sorry for my little rant. lol.  Feel free to leave a mean comment :)