Shaking the fear of rejection

Had a conversation with someone a couple of days ago about "putting yourself out there".  You know placing yourself in a position of vulnerability.  Basically, opening your heart to someone or showing your interest in the person, without knowing what response you would receive.

She said she absolutely could not do it.  She was scared of rejection.  My response was, "but aren't we all?"  Well at least a lot of us are.  Myself included.

Now the fact that I, in all my infinite confidence, fear rejection is something that would surprise most people.  After all, I am very bold, brazen even, aggressive and some might say a bit arrogant.  (I don't think so...I'm just extremely knowledgeable of my attributes and faults. LOL)

I am very methodical in my life. I strategize, think things through, then act at least 85% of the time.  The other 15%, I may go out on a limb...but that 15% is a rarity.  And I am not used to hearing no or being turned down.  I'm just not! So I, like many, do not want it to happen! LOL

Back to the confidence thing.  I can say, I have always been an apt person. I am capable of most things I endeavored to do.  However, I have always been quite aware of my faults. Sometimes painfully aware.  Don't get me wrong, I think most of who I am is superb lol, and I know others take notice.  But what plagues me are the shortcomings...wondering if people take notice of those as well.  And if in taking notice they will notice those more, than the positives. 

It is part of my perfection seeking character.  I seek perfection in myself, but not in other people.  But I often wonder if people view me, the way I view them.  Meaning accept me flaws and all. 

And because of that, when I come upon a situation where I don't quite know how I am viewed, that little thing in the back of my mind starts to tap dance around saying "Be careful...You don't know the outcome yet.  Wait and find out what it will be..."  Now this works much of the time.  But when it doesn't.  I don't move.

That is not a good thing because  1. You will rarely know the outcome of everything. 2. You will miss out on opportunities that could have had great outcomes.  3. Fear is never good. It cannot dwell in the same place as faith.

Now back to the confidence thing. I am very boldly confident. And it isn't just that flimsy superficial cocky thing.  Nope. I honestly believe deep within that I am an amazing person.  It took going through some things to get to that point.  But because of it, I go at different tasks in a very bold way.  Don't get it twisted, I am also very humble.  But what I tend not to allow myself to be is VULNERABLE.  That's where the fear lies.

I have had several people tell me to shake it.  Give me tips on how to do it. But I don't listen. (another one of my flaws. I only listen when I'm ready and willing to listen. LMBO).  For instance in talking to my guy friends about a guy I was interested in, but not sure of how he felt, they would scream at me to just tell him. (Not literally scream...but you know.) I would literally wait, to allow him to put himself out there first, and then act. But what happens if he has that same fear of rejection? We'd both come up empty handed.  

I recently decided that the fear is just not worth it.  I'm a practical person.  And practically speaking, fear costs too much.  And though I am not used to hearing no (I seriously never anticipate hearing no...at all...in anything..lol), I realize it isn't going to kill me. 

So how do you overcome the fear of rejection? GET REJECTED AND LIVE TO TELL ABOUT IT. LOL