Single Christians: Celibate or having sex?

Meagan Good and fiance, Pastor DeVon Franklin

Meagan Good started acting as a kid. You all probably remember her from Friday (little girl at Big Worm's icecream truck) or Cousin Skeeter. More recently she has appeared on The Game and in the movies Jumping the Broom and Think Like A Man.

Meagan recently became engaged to Pastor-Producer DeVon Franklin, who produced the movie Jumping the Broom. Pastor Franklin is a Seventh Day Adventist, and he and Meagan agreed to wait to consummate their relationship after marriage.

Strangely this bit of news crosses my desk, shortly after a reader asked my take on an Ebony article: Single, saved---and having sex. The byline reads:

A MAJORITY OF YOUNG CHRISTIANS ARE FOREGOING ABSTINENCE, EVEN AS THEY KEEP THE FAITH. CHECK OUT THIS EXPLOSIVE PIECE FROM THE MAY 2012 ISSUE OF EBONY

Quite frankly, I was slightly disturbed by the article, but not shocked.  After all there is usually more messiness going on with the pew riders, than the outsiders.  Which is a sad state of affairs, since Christians are supposed to know and do better. It is one thing to not know the Lord, another to profess to KNOW and LOVE Him and completely go against what you even feel is His will. It is kinda like being in a domestic violence relationship...I love you but, I'm about to blacken your eye.  An excerpt from the article shows this point:

Single father John Fitzgerald, 29, acknowledges the difficulty in putting faith before flesh and has even ended relationships because of the woman’s decision to remain abstinent. “Yes, it’s wrong, [but] I’m still doing it,” he says. “It’s something I struggle with in my personal relationship with God. People say, ‘Don’t make sex such a big deal,’ but for a lot of people, it’s a deal breaker.”

As long as you continue doing something that you know is counter to your own salvation, you do nothing more than make it more difficult for, not only your soul but for, the souls of those watching you.  Not to say it is easy to remain celibate when "everybody is doing it".  However, "everybody's doing it" is not justification for you to follow suit.

It would be easier to remain celibate if you did not give yourself over repeatedly to being tempted.  In #10 What he said, a guy talks about his struggle with celibacy, and how he over came temptation and married his wife after four years. Many folks will make excuses by saying one of my biggest pet peeves...lol... "God knows my heart".  But the funny thing is, God does know it...and it ain't what you think it is.

I did not write this to condemn or even judge anyone...we all have our own crosses to bear.  But do not go around calling wrong right and right wrong... That's indication of a reprobate mind. Want an example of "reprobate"? LOL... Check out this quote from the article:

JUST BECAUSE I HAVE A BIBLE ON MY NIGHTSTAND AND CONDOMS IN THE DRAWER DOESN’T MEAN I LOVE GOD ANY LESS OR THAT HE DOESN’T LOVE ME.

Okay...maybe that was a little judgmental of me...

What do you think? Is celibacy possible for Christians? Does having sex outside of marriage tarnish your salvation?