DAY 21 DV AWARENESS: Have fun

I grew up with these great aunts and grandmas who used to drop pearls of wisdom on me whenever I was around them. Though my grannies and most of my great aunts have passed on, their words stayed with me.

I can't remember which of them said this:  Baby, don't let nothing or no one steal your joy.

If those aren't words to live by, I don't know what is...Working in the industries that I work in, I come across a lot of joyless people. The relationships they've chosen to stay in, or find themselves leaving, have drained them of every ounce of happiness they once had.

Of course the relationships didn't start our that way. They began like any other relationship, then the sadness creeped on, the dysfunction took up residence, and the toxicity found a home. 

Something stole their joy. 

Joy stealing doesn't happen in healthy relationships. In healthy relationships, there is laughter and happy tears. A healthy relationship will marry two senses of humor and add laughter to your love. Laughter releases hormones (endorphins) that promotes blanched mental health. Laughter also lowers stress causing hormones like dopamine and cortisol. Laughter is food for the mind, body and soul. 

When people are in a healthy relationship, they seek excitement and enjoyment together. Everyone needs fun in order to function. Laughter and a good time is like a pressure release valve. Yes, there are some serious matters that you need a strong support system for, but a full life...a complete life...cannot be 100% serious all the time. 

A good partner in a good relationship will bring joy to the relationship, not misery. You each should endeavor to lighten each other's loads and partake in uplifting each other's spirits.

Don't be afraid to try new things together. Get out and take on life. Play tour guide or personal trainer for each other. Learn a new language together...go for a hike...plan a couple's pampering day. Do something you never thought you would do...like paintball or a painting class.

Think about the things you enjoyed as a child...you can do those things as an adult and your mate can join in. Carve out some time in your lives to focus on fun and finding happiness in your relationship. 

There is so much in the world to explore and so much life to be lived. Give each other laughter and love. Set your partner up to smile when he/she thinks of you and your time together. 

Make it so that, you work hard to ensure that your relationship has no room for misery, sorrow or pain. Breathe life, laughter and love into your relationship...and don't let nothing or no one steal your joy.